When Faults Collide (Faultlines Book 1) Read online

  “That’s right, baby. That’s an order,” Amy told him.

  Suddenly I burst into sobs. Katherine came and put her arm around me, as I laid my head on Blake and sobbed.

  “Shhh,” she said soothingly.

  “It’s my fault. I tempted fate,” I cried.

  “What, dear?” Katherine asked.

  “Yes, what are you talking about?” Amy demanded.

  I lifted my head up and sniffed. “It was too good to be true. I told Blake that it felt too easy. It’s my fault. This is all my fault.”

  I laid my head back down and cried hysterically.

  Katherine put her hand on my shoulder and pushed me back gently but firmly, so that I was sitting up again.

  “You listen to me, Asha. You did not do a thing wrong. He did not do a thing wrong. You, of all people, know that sometimes bad things just happen. Those things are not anyone’s fault. It’s just the reality of humankind. Bad things happen,” Katherine scolded.

  “Asha, Blake was successful, and had risen above many things. But let me tell you, he was miserable before you came along. I have never seen my son as happy as I have seen him with you. There is no way possible that this is your fault. You want to place blame? Place it on the asshole who ran a red light and hit you. This is his burden to carry. Don’t you dare blame yourself. Do you understand me?” Amy stated firmly.

  I nodded, my bottom lip trembling as tears continued cascading down my face, and laid my head back onto Blake.

  “Come back to me, baby,” I begged him.

  Chapter Thirty Two

  Four days. For four days the love of my life has been in a coma. Two days ago the doctors said the swelling had subsided and that they were taking him off of the medication that was keeping him in a coma. For two days he’s still been out of it. The doctors said that this happens, and that he’s stable and his brain is showing normal levels of activity, but that we won’t know anything until he wakes up. Amy (Blake’s mom) and I haven’t left his side, and I won’t. My friend Beatrice brought me clothes to change into and tried to convince me to go home and shower. It’s not happening. I will not leave this room until he is leaving with me. The police came to question me about the accident, and it looks like the driver is being charged with vehicular assault. I shouldn’t be happy, but I am. Maybe that makes me a bad person. Maybe it’s because in my life justice has rarely been served, so if it can finally be given, I’ll take it. My therapist comes by every day to check on me and keeps bringing me things. Today she brought me my laptop so I could blog. So here I am, blogging to you all, while my boyfriend lays in a hospital bed refusing to come back to me. I alternate between utter anguish and anger. Time doesn’t exist. The only time that matters is the time between breaths and the time it takes him to come back. Four days.

  xoxo, Asha

  I closed my laptop and sighed deeply.

  “I’m going to run down and get some food, what do you want Asha?” Amy asked me, slipping her shoes on.

  “Nothing. But since I know you’re going to make me eat, I’ll take a turkey sub,” I muttered.

  Amy smiled an understanding smile and walked out of the room. At this point I wasn’t sure if she was staying for Blake or for me. She had been mothering me the entire four days we had been there.

  Maybe I needed her. I needed something.

  What I needed was Blake. I held his hand as I set my laptop on the floor.

  “Baby, the nurses said that maybe you can hear us. If you can hear me, please come back. I can’t do this without you. Life is meaningless and nothing without you,” I said, sobs working their way up again.

  They had taken him off the ventilator the day they stopped giving him meds for the coma and he was breathing on his own. I laid my head on his lap and listened to his breathing.

  “I survived without you, but I didn’t live. I existed, just trying to make it through the day. Babe, I didn’t even realize what I was missing until you. Please, please, please come back,” I continued to profess through my cries.

  Suddenly I felt a hand on the top of my head. I jerked up and looked up to find Blake’s eyes watching me.

  “Oh my God! Blake! Oh my God!” I screamed, pressing the nurse’s button and reaching up to put his face in my hands. Tears poured freely down my face.

  “Hi, gorgeous girl,” he whispered.

  “Blake, I—I thought I was losing you! Oh my God,” I said, before leaning down and kissing his cheek.

  “Never, babe. Water?” he rasped.

  “Yes, oh my God, yes.” I said, pouring him a cup and grabbing a straw. I hesitated, not sure if I was allowed to give it to him.

  The nurse came in and looked him over and looked at his stats and said she was going to go page the doctor. She gave me permission to give him the water, so I let him take sips from the straw while I held the cup up for him.

  “They were out of turkey, Asha, so I got you ham. I hope that’s—oh my God!” Amy exclaimed, coming through the door. She dropped the bags in her hands and ran to Blake’s side.

  “Baby boy! Oh my sweet baby boy!” she said while stroking his hair.

  “You were both here? How long have I been out of it?” he asked, his voice sounding better after drinking the water.

  “Yes, we were both here,” I said softly.

  “Asha never left your side,” Amy told him.

  “You’ve been out of it for four days,” I added.

  His eyes widened. “Four days? Oh shit, babe. Are you okay?”

  “Me? I’m fine. Are you okay?” I demanded, looking at him.

  “Never better,” He joked.

  Amy slapped his arm. “No time for jokes, young man.”

  The doctor came in, checked him out, had him do a few things like squeeze his hand, and asked him a bunch of questions. He said they had to do some blood work and have him sent down for a CT scan, but he didn’t see anything to cause concern at this time.

  It took several days to get Blake up and able to walk around, but every test came back clear and finally he was able to be released. He had to follow up with neurology in a month, but they expected him to be cleared at that time.

  It was a miracle. For the kind of injury he had, he very well could have had permanent damage, so walking out of the hospital with him only slightly weaker, but mostly himself, was something I didn’t take for granted.

  Just like our lives and the timing of our relationship, fate had worked its magic and made everything the way that it should be.

  Chapter Thirty Three

  “We’re almost there, babe.” Blake said, reaching for my hand.

  “Okay, but you know you owe me big for this,” I said, huffing and puffing for air.

  Hiking.

  For some reason Blake thought that since he was finally healed from the accident, it would be awesome to go on a flipping hike.

  I thought I was in shape. Yeah...until the Blue Ridge Trail handed me my ass. This was exhausting.

  We made our way towards a clearing in front of us and when Blake helped pull me up the final step I gasped.

  It was breathtaking; a full panoramic view of the mountains. Early signs of spring were showing so the landscape was littered with green.

  Suddenly I heard We The Kings’ Sad Song playing and turned to see Blake setting his phone and a small speaker down.

  “Dance with me?” he asked.

  I smiled and took his hand. He pulled me close and we swayed to the music, breathing in the mountain air, surrounded by nothing but beauty.

  When the song was done he pulled and brushed my hair back so he could look at me.

  “Gorgeous girl, I love you.”

  “I love you too, Blake,” I said happily.

  “I know you think I’ve got it all together. You think I was the together one, but the truth is babe, I was nothing before you. You fill a void I didn’t even know I had,” he said.

  “Blake,” I whispered, eyes threatening tears.

  Then he reached in
to his pocket and pulled out a small, black velvet box before sinking down to one knee.

  My hand flew up to cover my mouth as I gasped.

  “You complete me in every possible way. I love you, and I want you beside me for the rest of my life. Marry me?” he asked, his voice a little higher than normal, from emotion.

  I didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”

  “Yes?” he asked.

  “Yes! Blake...yes, I’ll marry you!” I exclaimed and he stood and grabbed me, spinning me around.

  Three months later I sat in the dressing room as Lily put the finishing touches on my hair.

  I had shocked everyone when I decided that I wanted to wear a crimson gown with a beautiful gold pattern around the bodice. I wanted to pay tribute to my culture, or half of my culture, at least.

  Lily attached the crimson silk veil to the back of my updo and leaned down to look at both of us in the mirror.

  “Stunning,” she said simply.

  I nodded, wondering what my mom would think.

  “Hey, Lils, could you give me a second?” I asked.

  “Sure, hon. We will be right outside waiting on you,” she said before kissing me on the cheek and leaving me.

  I pulled my laptop out of the bag on the floor and opened it up.

  I opened Blogger and began to write.

  Since the first day I stepped toot into America, I’ve lived my life with a certain level of control. The rules came later, but I had been subconsciously creating them the entire time, throwing up walls to keep everyone out. I thought that by keeping everyone out I could ward off the darkness—the memories.

  You see, I have PTSD.

  Or, maybe you could say that I had PTSD.

  Everyone who was close in my life knew this, but their assumptions as to why were vastly skewed. Everyone assumed that it was because of my life in Kolkata; the first thirteen years of my life, growing up in a brothel.

  Truthfully, maybe if I’d had a different childhood, my condition would not have been so severe.

  But I’ll never know the answer to that.

  So here it is folks—my whole truth. The truth that I’ve spent ten years concealing from everyone except my therapist, and most recently, from Blake.

  The night that my mother died, I was not with her in her final moments because I was being brutally raped by a total stranger.

  And I don’t know his story. Maybe he thought I was a prostitute. Maybe he was mentally ill. Maybe he was just evil. I’ll never have the answers to those questions.

  But it no longer matters. Because by speaking my truth, I am freeing myself. I am no longer a victim.

  He stole so much more than my virginity and innocence that day. He stole my free will, my sanity, and my power.

  Today I take that back.

  You see, my number one rule, the rule that I kept s diligently for so many years—no romantic relationships—is gone. By allowing Blake into my life, my walls have crumbled.

  I am not a victim anymore. I am not a survivor. I am not a child of a prostitute. I am not lost, never truly belonging to a culture.

  I am Asha. I am my own person.

  Yes, my life had a shitty start. My childhood is not full of loving parents, soccer games, birthday parties, and sleepovers.

  And many times I have, with a heavy heart of guilt, wondered if that’s what my life would have been if my mother had contacted my father immediately. He would have married her, he would have saved both of us, because that’s who my father is.

  But then I wouldn’t have my step mom, my therapist, my best friends, and most certainly—I wouldn’t have Blake.

  Our completely broken pasts led us to this day, to this future together. And there is nothing broken about that.

  So today I take back my power.

  To my attacker, whom I will never know—I forgive you. I don’t know your reasons or whether you are dead or alive, but that’s not why I forgive you. I forgive you because holding on to the hatred I feel for you has destroyed me for far too long. That hatred is gone. I will never forget, but I forgive you.

  Today I forgive, and through that forgiveness I take back all control over my life without rules or guidelines.

  I am free.

  And as a free woman, not as a victim, not as a fellow survivor, I choose Blake.

  I choose all the love that he has to offer and I offer up every ounce of love I have to give.

  Because hatred and fear have kept me in the dark for so long, today I choose love. And by choosing love I choose hope and light.

  And through that I am healed.

  xoxo, Asha

  Coming in December 2015

  Surviving the Aftershock

  Faultlines Series Book Two

  Continue Asha and Blake’s journey in the exciting sequel!

  Can’t get enough Asha and Blake? Head to www.ClaireGrangerBooks.com to follow them on Twitter, read Asha’s blog, and find exclusive content, including excerpts from the upcoming sequel Surviving the Aftershock.

  Coming Soon

  Kenna’s Reverie

  Daydreaming Series Book One

  From the world of When Faults Collide, meet Kenna and Jax in the exciting first of a new novella series.

  Visitwww.ClaireGrangerBooks.com to see excerpts and find pre-order links!

  A Note from the Author

  Thank you for joining me for the beginning of this journey with Asha and Blake! I hope you fell in love with them as much as I did! If their histories and pasts upset you—good! Their stories, while fiction, represent the millions of children all over the world with similar stories.

  In the US alone, there are over 500,000 children living in foster care at any given time. Human trafficking is a worldwide problem—America is not immune!

  If this book and their stories inspired you to help in any way, then this book has portrayed the message that I hoped that it would!

  To find out how you can help, head to the following sites:

  Foster Care/Adoption:

  www.adoptuskids.com

  www.davethomasfoundation.com

  www.togetherwerise.com

  www.CASA.org

  Human Trafficking:

  www.traffickingresourcecenter.org

  If you know of a child being neglected or abused—do not be silent! All it takes is one person to change the life of a child and potentially disrupt an entire chain of familial dysfunction! To report child abuse or neglect please call: 1-800-422-4453.

  Lastly, talk openly about these issues! Bring them up! Create conversation and dialogue about the tough subjects so that other people can think about it and talk about it, too. You never know whether one person you’ve talked to could have the potential to change a life, or even the world! We are all humans, and these are human problems! Regardless of your background, socioeconomic status, culture, gender, sexuality, religion, or anything else—we are all humans. We all get one chance at this thing called life. Let’s make it count and make a change!

  Again, thank you so much for joining me on this journey!

  Follow me on social media for all my latest updates!

  www.twitter.com/TheGrangerBunch

  www.facebook.com/ClaireGrangerBooks

  www.instagram.com/ClaireGrangerBooks

  Be sure to also find me on Goodreads!

  Acknowledgements

  First and foremost, thank you to my parents for adopting me. I am who I am because of you! Every gift and talent given to me by God was cultivated and encouraged by you. Your support and love for me is unconditional and for that I am eternally grateful!

  Thank you to my crazy best friend, Emily! You carried me through this entire process from start to finish—just like every other major thing in my life! You have been my rock solid, my one consistent thing through every crazy, messed up choice that I made. You have never judged me for my past, never probed or questioned me or forced me to open up more than I wanted to. Life has taken us in so many different directions, but regardless if it
has been a day or a year I know you are the one I can call at 3am and it will be like we only just left each other. You have, by far, been my biggest supporter in this journey!

  Thank you to my husband, the love of my life! You pulled me out of my darkness and gave me faith and hope and love without judgement. You took the most broken part of me and put me back together. Through every single step of our journey, you have loved me and supported me. You are my soul mate...an unlikely match that is perfectly imperfect! I love you, I love you, I love you!

  To my amazing, wonderful children! You changed my life in ways I didn’t know possible. Thank you for the gift of parenthood. Thank you for tolerating mommy’s obsession over this book. You are miracles and the biggest blessings in my life! You are my heart and I love you to the moon and back, my loves!

  To all of my “temporary loves” (children we’ve fostered) and all of our permanent connections—every single one of you have impacted my life. Sharing your stories with me, sharing a piece of yourself...you made me want to do more. Thank you for allowing me to be a piece of your voice! Thank you for not giving up, for being survivors, and for teaching me more than I could ever teach you! This story would not have to come to pass without you.

  To every child in foster care—you are amazing. You are brave, smart, and strong. You have survived and will continue to survive. Never give up. You have unlimited potential and every right to be whoever you can be!

  To every human trafficking victim—you are not nothing. You matter. Your voice matters, your stories matter, and I will never be silent about your plight. Continue to fight, continue to survive, and never give up.

  To my wonderful beta readers! Thank you for providing honest feedback and helping me make this book what it is! I love each and every one of you and you are just as big of a reason this book is here! A special shout out to Khadra who gave me the most detailed and constructive feedback for the entire book—you are amazing!

  To every person who reads this book—THANK YOU! You are making my dreams come true by allowing my words into your heart and mind. I love and appreciate every single last one of you!